In case anyone actually reads this, I actually did make it out to Albuquerque without making an errant left turn. Come to think of it, that would make me Mexico's first illegal alien. That is, a non-Mexican citizen entering that country illegally. Nah, it wouldn't happen. You think the water's just bad...sheesh.

Yes blog fans it's time for another entry in the rather uneventful life of mine.

I'm trying to summize what in my life is worth remembering. I'm tired of being alone. I continually get the "just friends" response. We are talking like several years of this crap. I am starting to believe that it is a problem with me. The only common denominator in all of this is me. Starting to doubt the sanity of continually trying to meet someone. There is one woman, right now, who I would spend my life with without reservation. Now if she only wasn't already married. She loves me, as I do her, but is determined to make her marriage work. I have to respect that, even if I know in my soul that she/I are the right thing.

Don't get me wrong, friends are good too, but I am tired of doing "this" all alone. I just want to meet someone who gets me, so I can stop feeling like half a person. I am quite adept at living my life alone, but I just don't want to. Is it desperation to just want that connection to another human being? Apparently so.

Anyway. Albuquerque. Here I am.

I am looking forward to going back to school in January, even tho part of me is scared to death of amassing more debt with no real guarantee of paying it off in this lifetime. But I am determined to stop living my life afraid of things. I am relying heavily on the confidence that the Schraggers and others have in me, especially when I am unsure of myself. I am thankful for those people.

It makes me realize how much I miss my parents. Mom's been gone for almost 17 years and Dad almost 10. Not all the time, but at times I wish I could go get a hug from Mom or a kick in the ass from Dad so-to-speak. Just something to put the world in check for a bit. When that sort of thing happens to you, you don’t sit back and realize how much of an impact it is. You just go on living day-to-day.

Got a decent bit of news about a friend of mine in Boston. She was from the same earthly devoid that I am from (namely the Lehigh Valley PA) and she was able to extract herself from there. Now she’s finally living a life that she deserves, and she’s writing and performing her own literary works to boot. You can find her links on this page. Yay Carissa.

She’s one of my dear friends who sees the better part of my nature when the rest of the planet fails to notice my existence. She owe’s me a dance at her wedding, seeing as I predicted she would get married someday. Way to go Randolph. I’ve never met the gent but he’s a good egg in my book if he can convince her she deserves happiness. Hope he’ll let me buy him a drink next year.